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How to convince your child to ask for help when being bullied

2/21/2011

 
As a former victim of bullying, there are certain things that stick out in my mind when I think about children these days. But how do we get through to them to let them know that it is ok to tell and or ask for help? Most bullies will threaten the victim to hurt them even more if the victim tells on the bully...so how do we reach are children and teach them that it is perfectly fine to be a "tattle tell" if they are having problems?

Talk to your child and let them know that you cannot help them if you don’t know that something is wrong.

Tell your child that you are concerned about them and that you are there to help them if needed.

Ask them direct questions like: are there any kids at school, on the bus, or in the neighborhood that is picking on you or someone you know?

If and when you find out that your child is being bullied...act quickly. Contact the teacher of the class, the bus driver, or the principal. You should also contact the parents of the child doing the bullying.

The fact is that some parents may not be aware that their child is a bully. You have to convince the victims that they cannot be scared to speak up for themselves, and that they have people to help them. Statistics show that present day, kids are being bullied at an alarming rate. And when the victims have no one to turn too, they turn to violence themselves. If there are weapons in the house, the victims will either turn it on the bully, or on themselves and commit suicide...those should not be our kid’s only options. We cannot continue to turn the other cheek and let our kids down. We as the parents and teachers should be the first line of defense.

Stats show that if your child has: braces, glasses, considered to be "too tall", "to short"; "too skinny", "too fat/big", "too smart"...these will be the prime targets of bullies.

Let your child know that they can trust you, and that you can and will help them.

Most bullies are cowards...they have something wrong with them or at home that makes them lash out and be dominate against there peers. They usually have low self esteem, and other flaws, so to divert the teasing that they would or have suffered, they find a weaker person than them and pick on them. You will NEVER see a bully pick on someone bigger or tougher than them.

Lastly, in today’s society, we have to be aware as parents that there is: physical, mental, emotional, verbal and now cyber bullying. We have to protect them from any and all types of bullying.

Some references provided by: D. Olweus, Bullying at school, D. Olweus, S. Limber, S. Mihalic: The bullying prevention Program

S.K. Bailey
isaiah
3/30/2011 05:42:10 am

its not right to get bullied n it makes us feel bad im isaih n i never been bullied n im happy n im 6 yearsold too feel better

Stupid Girl link
6/14/2011 04:56:18 pm

Sometimes the kid getting picked on is abused at home, too. Being bullied by a parent can make a child withdrawn, shy, and insecure...a perfect target for a bully. What's bad about that is the child is abused at school and then goes home and gets abused again, often by a parent who is angry at him for not fitting in at school. If a parent is mentally ill this can be likely to happen.


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    LaNiyah Bailey

    Award-winning youth author and anti-bullying advocate.

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